at 2am I wrote a page of words that turned into black smudge from my bitter tears. It was rather cathartic and when I woke up I thought I was cured. I lay in bed and slowly I thought about nothing and I began to die again. Anyway. I ate some salad for lunch and am having a herbal tea and maybe I might swim to the bottom of the ocean and hand cuff myself to a sunken ship and throw away the key and drown. No, really I am great. I feel pretty swell. Even though my eyes are starting to sting again.